A message to you Rosie
Not Rudy, Rosie. This one is for you. If only you could see how fucking beautiful you really are. I don’t think you see it yourself but you’re genuinely one of the most beautiful girls I’ve ever seen. Everytime I’ve shown you to one of my friends they’ve just been like ‘wow’ and I’m like ehehe I’m so lucky to have Rosie in my life. Looking back I kinda don’t know what the fuck I did without you. Whenever I’m having a down day I literally just think of you and the shit you’d say to me to make me smile and just laugh and everyones like ‘Emily’s a psycho’ and I’m just like ‘I don’t care cos I’ve got Rosie North and if you don’t have a psycho, perverted, peadofilic friend like Rosie you have the equivalent to nothing’. I quite honestly consider you to be one of my best friends, you are seriously one of the only people I trust and I am so excited for you to come down for my birthday. I just hope you’re not a big butch lesbian carrying a hot dog wearing a baseball cap backwards with ratty ginger hair. But I know you’re not. You are my gorgeous Rosie North. You are fucking perfect. And if a stupid boy with a penis the size of my index finger can’t see that, then he’s the one missing out. Not you. I can say this in confidence knowing you feel the same way. We completely understand each other, my mum wants to rape you and I want to rape you equally as much so it’s all good. I’m not arsed to put paragraphs in this, But I know you won’t care, cos you’re Rosie, and you love me for who I am. And I love you for who you are, I even love your cheesy vagina, I really do, it smells equally as gorgeous as Maddie on a Sunday morning after she makes us our pancakes. One day we’re gonna run away and be naturists and lez off and your gonna show me your muff and we’re gonna have hitler pubes and we’re going to spend our lives at nudist beaches running around with nothing but a leaf covering our genitals, maybe not even that. We’re going to listen to ska all day and moonstomp until the moon comes and maybe even after that. We’re going to live on junk food and I’ll chain smoke and you can sit and watch me and fancy me and we will lez off again. Our lives are gonna be mint. I can’t wait to meet you, you are fucking amazing Rosie. You are a strong independent woman and you don’t need anyone to make you smile (apart from me and your family and your real friends). This is so cringey and cheesy but I don’t care. I hope you’re smiling right now. :) You deserve to smile. You’ve got a beautiful smile yano?
Sincerely, Bug
